In The Wave Pool

"Pure love is an incomparable, potent power for good. Righteous love is the foundation of a successful marriage... Marriage is wonderful. In time you begin to think alike and have the same ideas and impressions. You have times when you are extremely happy, times of testing, and times of trial, but the Lord guides you through all of those growth experiences together."

-Richard G Scott ( The Eternal Blessings of Marriage, April 2011, General Conference)

Have you ever been in a wave pool?

As a kid I remember going to Water World and waiting for them to turn on the waves, anxious and nervous and excited all at the same time. When the waves started they were small, easy to handle and low enough to jump over; I remember thinking that I could ease out a little further, afterall the waves weren't that big. Minutes later I would be struggling to keep my little head above the waves, grabbing onto anyone or anything near me, pulling them down and making others lose their balance, eventually I would end up closer to the shore, back to where the waves were more mild. As I got older and became a more proficient swimmer, I found that I could handle the bigger waves, that they didn't wash me out or tower above my head, I no longer needed help to stay afloat and could manage myself in the deep end. After 7 months of marriage I've found that it is much like a wave pool. 

In the beginning I thought it would be so easy to compromise, to get along, to make decisions, to be agreeable, to communicate and to share, so I jumped in with both feet and swam like a banshee to the deep end, anxious for the waves to start rolling; and roll they did. You see I was not yet a skilled enough swimmer to be in the deep end, I had not thought through all the waves that might come crashing down on my head and had not considered that I would need a flotation device or lifeguard on the sidelines. I had not taken the time to truly understand the eternal choice I had made and all that accompanies a "wave pool" of this magnitude. Needless to say the the first 5 months of marriage were full of big waves, lots of swallowed water and many many flotation devices thrown my way. 

Ever since I can remember my mother has always told me that I am extremely stubborn...and as much as I hate to admit it, she's right. I have a habit of taking the scenic route, doing things the hard way and learning lessons first hand; I've never been one to "take someone's word for it", or "learn from others mistakes", all in all I've swallowed a lot of water over the years. Though I've struggled to keep my head above the waves on numerous occasions I've really only feared "drowning" twice, once on my mission and again right after I got married. I love and adore my husband, but to say being married has been the happiest, easiest time of my life would be an out-right lie and I'm confident my husband would tell you the same thing. Now I won't go into detail about the different kinds of "hard" we have faced but I will tell you that we are coming out on the other side of it and that choosing to keep our covenants to Heavenly Father and to each other has easily been the best decision I have ever made in my entire life. While I may be the most stubborn kid my mother has raised --bless her heart-- I've learned so so much, and believe me when I say that there are some lessons that I wish I would have "taken my mothers word for", but the growth in my marriage, my testimony and my faith in a loving Savior are things I would not trade for the world. During this time in our "wave pool", we have both fought against the current, kicked till our legs cramped, swallowed gallons of water and feared drowning, because of this experience we have slowly learned to ride the waves, to call out to a "lifeguard" --when needed-- and enjoy this time we have together, learning to swim, float and carry on. Marriage is hard, life is hard but the comfort that comes from living the gospel eases the growing pains and helps us to become the people God sent us here to become. All of our experiences are pushing us to become like Him and for that opportunity I'd gladly fight the waves for eternity.